I still want to hold your hand everywhere, at home, in public, during sex and while we sleep. I have so many questions that will have to remain unans...ered. This loss, the slow grind of acceptance, is terrible. You fill my thoughts and my heart hurts. I wish for a different outcome. Crazy thoughts shoot through my head, bouncing off memories of you. What if I’d called sooner? I should have sent more little positive messages. I should have just asked permission to visit. If I had, you’d still. "It's so strange to meet you in person." "Star-struck already fresh meat? Well, you're on the same level as me now, you got in for a reason, you know," She smirked caustically and took a bite of the granola bar that she had brought out of her backpack. Her odd, erratic personality made him laugh again, "So, your name is gonna be in history books?" I guess so," she shrugged. "How's that feel?" "Couldn't tell you. I don't think about it all that much," she said, "Well, most of the time it doesn't. More

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