I was checking my messages on my Fido cellphone and got a message from my landlord, an old white dude named Keith. He said that my asshole of a roomma...e, a Haitian bastard named Lenny, informed them that after a year with me at the apartment on Donald Street, he was moving out. Hell yeah. Good riddance. I decided to put the apartment up in search of a new roommate a day ago, just in case Lenny was moving out. I’m so glad I’m going to be rid of him. He’s a mean-spirited bozo who doesn’t pick up. We’re looking at an increased throughput at the magnitude of close to eight. The entire unit, including a terabyte solid-state drive is encased in a small, shielded metal unit and cooled by a non-conductive liquid. As a result, it’s super fast, almost totally quiet, and has no fans or heat sinks. It has built in surge protection, battery backup, and the core unit isn’t affected by an electromagnetic pulse.”“Can I buy stock, and how can Microsoft get involved?”“Sorry about the stock. It’ll never. More

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