I had saved her from a bad path and she managed to find the happiness- the glorious happiness- of a content and loving family. She had the comfort of ...he good ordinary life- something I had eschewed my entire adult life- and though I had eschewed it, the rewards of it had a certain allure.There were others, too, that I loved or liked. For many I longed for what they had gotten- not jealously, but to enjoy it too. Or I longed for another moment of what we had shared once, with that person, the. Even then I was attracted to him, but he hardly occupied my mind, and I truthfully never expected to see him again. When he woke up I was still waiting on the floor for him. He had slept for three hours and I had waited there for him the whole time. I was helpless. He smiled, seeing me still there. He called me a good boy. He would always call me a boy. I wasn't, and I’m still not, but his invalidation of my very core identity would always send a shiver through me.He told me to have shower, to. More

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